Operation Ninja Launch

In which new ninjas become acquainted with The Mission.

It's been a rough year for College Ninja. After an adventurous first year filled with wonderful discoveries and accomplishments, I crashed into sophomore year. We'll get into specifics if they're needed, but for now, with your limited security clearance, all you need to know is this: I thought I had it all figured out, and I was wrong.

As I flopped around like that fish trying to escape the sailor in the beginning of The Little Mermaid, I held on to anything I could: advice from friends, strangers and dysfunctional TV characters, music, poetry, memories of my childhood and most importantly, my imagination. So here at the end of the school year, I've developed a pretty extensive list of realizations and somewhat unusual coping strategies. As it turns out, I know more than I thought I did. Which is indeed a tiny amount of knowledge. But still.

I started this blog as a way for me to chronicle all I've learned and am learning and share some of my ideas with you. While I recognize that my readership will probably consist of my great aunt Francie (the most technologically savvy seventy-something lady in the world) and my mom (HI MOM!), I'm going to address you, Reader, as though you are attempting to survive this college nonsense alongside me.

My general philosophy is this: when life gets tough, imagine something cool and use it to get you through.  This is why I'm pretending to be a ninja-college-advisor and why instead of getting blog posts, you will get missions and protocols and briefings. These are all part of your larger mission, The Mission, if you will, which is, should you choose to accept it, to do college like a badass.

Being on your own and trying to build a life for yourself without having the faintest idea of what's going on can be overwhelming. So this is me fighting back, claiming what I do know and learning to swim.

(Classified Video 1. See minutes 1:42-2:00 for the scene mentioned above.)